My lady [bump]…anyone else now singing in their head??

 

     I finally decided to take the official “bump” picture; it only took me 25 weeks! I really feel like I wasn’t big enough to warrant a picture until the past two weeks, but it is highly probable that I was in denial. (I still haven’t even made an official announcement to my classes. I figure if they haven’t used their powers of reasoning to put the pieces together, than they don’t deserve to know. Besides, I get new students next week.)

   

     To be fair, this picture was taken after a big dinner, so it is also highly probably that most of what you see is just enchiladas.

Victoria's Secret is not my best friend

And here's why:

I have never had anything against Victoria's Secret in the past; other than the fact that they don't carry my size in the store anymore, I have always found it a pleasant place to shop. I had a few of their swimsuits for my honeymoon. I probably have some lingerie from there as well. In fact, I probably bought said lingerie during their Semi-Annual sale, which brings me to my point.

I don't look like Victoria Secret models. I never really have. Not that anyone ever really can in reality, but that's another story. But right now especially, I really don't look like their models. At 23 weeks pregnant, there are a lot more bumps than there used to be, and I have definitely lost my waist line. But now that their Semi-Annual sale is on, it causes my some distress.

And here's why:

My husband is always making eyes at the girls in the commercial! He has always had a thing for Heidi, and I'm okay with that, but it's getting a little ridiculous now! I try to explain that I have more breasts than all of those girls combined, to which he explains, that maybe if I could show them off and bend down next to a pole, he could make those eyes at me, too.

I can't even bend to put on shoes very well.

This is not fair!

(Please note that if you are not familiar with my (or my husband's for that matter) sense of humor, you may be a little disturbed by this entry. Let me assure you, we are happy. I do not feel neglected or unwanted. I'm just saying.)

More than half way there

When I first found out I was pregnant, I made a committment to myself to journal along the way. I wanted to remember how it felt. I wanted to write about the emotions and excitement of this phase of my life. I really wanted to take time to enjoy the process.

I didn't.

Instead of sitting down and trying to catch-up (which is how I have "journaled" my entire life), I am just going to start from where I am.

Besides, if I had been more vigilant in journaling during the pregnancy, most of the entries would have gone something like this:

"Threw up as soon as I got out of bed this morning at 5:15. Decided not to wash my hair (for the third or fourth day in a row) because then I can sit in bed just a little bit longer. Plus, the thought of sitting with a hair dryer makes me want to vomit. Taught a full day of school. Tired. Went to another football (or basketball or practice) with the cheerleaders. Wanted to vomit. Ate as much as I could keep down. Sat on the couch. Felt like crap after my dinner of a Wendy's baked potato. Maybe tomorrow will be better."

Awesome, huh?

Anyway, I am not in week 21, which means that I am more than half way through this pregnancy. Completeley unbelievable. I still wouldn't say that I feel amazing, but I am feeling much better. We haven't stopped to do any shopping or preparing for this baby yet, but that is my goal in January--nesting.

The ultrasound was three weeks ago, and we decided not to find out the sex of the baby, sorry Mom. I didn't feel the baby move until last week; at least I didn't recognize the rumblings in my stomach as baby movements until last week. Chris felt the baby kick just a few days ago. Weird.

We are really excited for this baby to come, but I still have to make it through another semester!!!

On another note, Chris and I took the dog to the park today because the temperature actually reached 50 degrees. She finally got the courage to get in the water on her own. I'm not sure she expected the drop-off, but she survived. Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Dang you, Eve! And other such blasphemies.

Why do I say this? If I recall my biblical stories, because Eve ate the fruit, there is now multiplied sorrow in conception of children. That's right people, I'm pregnant. And sorrowful. And by sorrowful, I mean sick. All. The. Time.

As of today, I am 11 weeks (+ two days) pregnant. I keep hoping for the day when I wake up and feel better. The day that everyone tells me is just around the corner. I hope this corner is shorter rather than longer.

Anyhow, here's the scoop:

We had been trying for about five/six months, and to be honest, we were really surprised when it happened during August. Chris was working in the Trauma ICU, a month of very long hours. But he had a "Golden Weekend," meaning he had Saturday and Sunday off in a row, which happen to be conducive to baby-making. And for those of you that we have lied to about whether we were trying to get pregnant, I'm not really sorry. It's an odd question really. Aren't you really just asking us how much unprotected sex we have?

I found out the night before the new school year started. Oddly though, I was really annoyed with my husband when I took the pregnancy test. In fact, I didn't even tell him that's what I was doing. I just went upstairs and took it. I stared at that test for several minutes trying to decide if what I saw was really a + sign. So I took it downstairs to the medical professional to ask his opinion, at which point he commented about me getting some pee on the outside of the stick, yuck. Like he doesn't come home some days with stranger's bodily fluids on his socks!

We both stared at the test. We stared at the examples on the test instructions. We determined that I "might" be pregnant. We hugged and kissed. We took awkward pictures with the stick. We went to bed.

The next day was the first day of school for me, and to be honest, I didn't think about it a whole lot. I was very busy. But every once in a while, I would stop, remember that I was pregnant, and smile.

The first week or so felt great, aside from a little heartburn. But when Week 6 came, so did the morning/noon/night sickness. With a bang. I even came home early from work one day because it was virtually impossible for me to stand up. That was the day I called the nurse to inquire about a prescription. She, of course, asked me if I had tried any over-the-counter remedies. I hadn't, which I explained, but I also explained that I was going on family vacation that would require me being on a houseboat for five days. She phoned in a prescription. A miracle drug.

We spent Week 7 at Lake Powell with my family, which is where we decided to tell them since we were all together. We called Chris's family as soon as we returned, and then started telling friends/coworkers over the next week or two. If you are just now finding out, it's only because I pretty much spend all of my time on the couch. I apologize. I honestly haven't told anybody that I don't come across face-to-face because that is about all I can handle. I'm tired.


I am now half way through Week 9, really looking forward to the day when the food that I crave doesn't make me want to puke when I think about it. I always knew that the stomach flu was the best way to lose a few pounds, but I definitely didn't expect pregnancy to be the same way.

Also? Chris told me the only reason he decided to get me pregnant was because he wants a Father's Day gift--a grill, in fact.

I'm assimilating

Tonight was Open House at the school and I caught myself saying something I never, ever, ever thought I would say. It was kind of like word vomit. But I'm not sure.

Many of the teachers, students, and parents at my school are from the South (and yes, I do think it needs to be capitalized), and as such have a wide array of accents. I hear very refined drawls to very severe twangs.

I guess talking to so many different Southerners all at once got me going.

As I was discussing with a parent where the best place to seat her child would be, I said:

"I might could put him over there."

Really? I don't even now how to might-could something!!!